Sunday, April 29, 2012

I'm already 2/3 of the way through The Map and the Territory and there are two notable passages: the one that is too long to quote about Charles Fourier, the organization of production and the political development of the William Morris company, and the one that I reread five times, that blew my mind - this one:

"...Olga was nice, she was nice and loving, Olga loved him, he repeated to himself with a growing sadness as he also realized that nothing would ever happen between them again; life sometimes offers you a chance, he thought, but when you are too cowardly or too indecisive to seize it life takes the cards away; there is a moment for doing things and entering a possible happiness, and this moment lasts a few days, sometimes a few weeks or even a few months, but it happens once and one time only, and if you want to return to it later it’s quite simply impossible. There’s no more place for enthusiasm, belief, and faith, and there remains just gentle resignation, a sad and reciprocal pity, the useless but correct sensation that something could have happened, that you just simply showed yourself unworthy of this gift you had been offered."

Houellebecq is an asshole, which makes this book such a pleasure to read because it's soft in all the right places. Kind of like when you bump into the school bully in the bathroom and they cry in your arms cause their dad locks them up in the basement every night and even though they revert back to bully after your encounter, suddenly you're all unguarded and feel like you want to be there for them. Is that weird? Sorry for the awful analogy. Anyway!

That passage sounds depressing but I love it so much! I often feel like a jerk too. And even though I know I probably am not one I find solace in the idea that even jerks have feelings and depth and aspirations beyond the immediate satisfaction - all that and whatever else it takes to create a "well rounded" personality.

I'm going to talk at Trampoline Hall next Monday, May 7th, come heckle me. Trampoline Hall is a lecture series. It's sunny and beautiful and I'm happy to be back in Toronto, someone come take pictures with me this week! 

Here's a song. Bye!

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